


Just Nuts

by YaoiMaster



Category: Naruto
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bathroom Sex, Blow Jobs, Car Sex, Comedy, Explicit Sexual Content, Face-Fucking, Fluff, M/M, NaruSasu - Freeform, SasuNaru (just one scene), Smut, Spit As Lube
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2020-06-25 18:34:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19751440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YaoiMaster/pseuds/YaoiMaster
Summary: Sasuke Uchiha is a squirrel. Wait, what? COME AGAIN??





	Just Nuts

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for clicking on my first posted work on this site! I would consider this to be one of my masterpieces cause it took ages and I love it so much! I'm also not the best at porn, so yeah. Anyways, before we get to the story, please note the warning below (read all of it before turning back!!!!)
> 
> WARNING!!!
> 
> This story contains bestiality because Naruto and Squirrel!Sasuke actually sleep together. But, you can still enjoy the story because I have put warning signs before those scenes, so if you don't wanna see them, then you can hop over them. As soon as a scene is about to start, you'll see WARNING ON! ALERT ON!. You can choose to go past that scene and start reading after WARNING OFF! ALERT OFF! 
> 
> If you don't mind, then please ignore the warning signs and read normally. 
> 
> This might be considered to be crack (was not sure) but I hope you enjoy it anyways.

**Note: Squirrel!Sasuke talks like this " _Hi, I'm Sasuke and I love Naruto!"_ and thinks like this "Sup".**

**-**

‘I tried throwing nuts and fruit at him, I tried biting him on the ear, I tried peeing on him and I tried making fun of him but that moron would just not leave!’

Sasuke sighed and glanced out of his tree hole, glaring at said man who had still not moved an inch ever since he came there. He had been there the whole morning and afternoon that Sasuke hadn’t any time to go down to collect his acorns nor had time to himself. He could just ignore him sure but the thought of the idiot sitting quietly at the bottom of _his_ tree would still linger, annoying him at every turn. Sasuke had no idea why the man pissed him off so much, maybe it was because of his bright orange shirt or blue pants or bright yellow hair but…he just did. ‘Aurgh…I can’t take much more of him…what does he want anyways? Why is he here?’ He thought, a bit curious. He wanted so much to just go down there and ask the man but he was sure the man didn’t speak or understand squirrel.

‘Aw screw this…I’m going to end this dumb curiosity…’ 

Making sure that the man hadn’t noticed him coming, he scurried quickly out of his home, crawling downwards until he was right on the idiot’s shoulder. _“Hey moron….why are you here?”_ He asked, holding on tightly when the man jumped in surprise. “Oh it’s you…have you come back to do more horrid things to me? Well I know what you’re doing and it’s not going to work so give up…” the man replied, who obviously hadn’t understood Sasuke. Sasuke glared daggers at him, wanting so much to do another horrid thing but refrained from so; He came for one purpose only. _“Idiot…why are you here? Why won’t you leave?”_ The blonde cocked an eyebrow before blowing a raspberry at Sasuke, pulling his tongue back before it was chewed to bits by the obviously now miffed squirrel. “I’m not leaving….besides; I came for one reason…” He said smugly, blinking when the squirrel moved closer. It almost looked as if he wanted to find out. ‘Is that possible? But you never know….’

“I came to find someone…we both made a promise back when we were younger to meet here at this tree when we were adults. We kind of didn’t set a date but I’ll be at the tree everyday until he comes….so don’t try to stop me because it’s a waste of time…” The blonde man said, smiling brightly at the black and white squirrel. Sasuke snorted at his explanation and turned away, having found it utterly stupid. He thought it was a waste of time to wait for someone who probably could be dead or half dead somewhere in the world all because of a little promise. ‘But of course I’m not human so I can’t relate to their weird customs….although it still gives me a weird feeling…’ the squirrel thought, glancing back at the blonde headed idiot. His face was lighted in a way and Sasuke felt the warm feeling of curiosity curl up in his stomach. He wanted to know why the idiot’s face would be lighted up so and he wanted to know what the other was to the blonde. But especially he wanted to know why he was so happy wasting his time waiting for a friend when he could be doing other exciting things.

He wanted to know everything about the blonde.

‘But I can’t ask him…I wish I wasn’t born a squirrel or at least communicate with him somehow...’ Sasuke thought miserably, frowning a bit. ‘But maybe I can…I just have to think…’ Glancing back at the blonde man once more, he scurried off to his house, head full of ideas he was ready to test out. He was so deep in his thoughts and ideas that he was oblivious to the eyes that watched him as he scurried off until he disappeared in his hole nor did he hear the name that blonde uttered. “Teme….”

Sasuke smiled at the sight of the idiot from yesterday, scurrying quickly from his home to perch right on his shoulder. He was truly excited about trying out his first communication idea that he almost forgot about his anger tantrum about yesterday completely. The blonde idiot hadn’t told him when he would leave and poor Sasuke who was hoping to try out his ideas that night was crestfallen. ‘But I will get my revenge…hopefully my idea will work and I can give this idiot a piece of my mind…’

“Hey there little guy….come back to torture me again or are you civilized like yesterday’s afternoon…?” the blonde said, petting the squirrel on his head. He got a bite on his finger in response for the little guy comment. “Alright… I know you’re pissed and I’m sorry for teasing you like that and so I offer an apple in peace offering…” Sasuke just blinked at him, showing no emotion despite his eagerness inside. He was starving as he hadn’t eaten anything due to him trying to get rid of the blonde idiot, talking to the blonde idiot and failing, and planning how to talk to the blonde idiot properly; obviously it was the blonde idiot’s fault. ‘At least he's taking responsibility…’ He thought, mentally mouthwatering at the sight of the juicy apple. It looked clean as if polished and fat with juicy goodness. Sasuke didn’t think he had ever seen such a good looking apple as that before. The blonde chuckled at the squirrel, obviously realizing how hungry the other was and handing the peace offering over. It was ravished instantly when it was within reach, disappearing in a few minutes. ‘He must have been very hungry…’ He thought, very amused at his new friend. It seemed he wasn’t the bastard he put himself to be. “Wow…that finished off fast. You sure were hungry!”

Sasuke ignored the idiot’s teasing and licked his lips, very satisfied as a cat after it had gotten its milk. The apple was very delicious as well as full filling and he felt the need to have more. ‘A perfect time to do my idea…’ He thought, jumping off the other’s shoulder. He ignored the other’s questioning stare and started to scratch at the dirt, never stopping until he had written a simple word.

****

**_More?_ **

‘What…the?’ the blonde thought, eyes bulging in shock. He had no idea that squirrels had the capability of making speech….he thought they weren’t that smart to do that. ‘Obviously I was wrong about them…’ Sasuke looked smugly at the idiot, knowing fully well that the other was in shock over what he just did. It wasn’t normal for a squirrel to write proper human language and he was satisfied to know that he had proof that he was a particular squirrel that knew how to speak and understand English. ‘Now for him to get over it and give me more apples to eat…’

The other shook his head in disbelief before holding his head as if he had a headache. He didn’t know how to explain this obviously scientific discovery nor did he know how to respond. A squirrel writing something back to you was something not to be taken lightly it seems. ‘Damn this isn’t me….surely I’m not in this type of shock…’ the blonde thought, frowning. Truthfully he was but he had too much pride to admit or show that. “Alright squirrel….I am not going to repeat this so listen carefully. I am very surprised that you understand me and can reply and I’m okay with that but….if you have anymore bombshells you need to throw down, please do now…” Getting a negative in response he continued, absolutely relieved. He didn’t think his heart could handle another bombshell.

“Good…also, I am sorry to say but I do not have any more apples…”

Sasuke frowned, obviously disappointed but not showing it. He had too much pride to show weakness in front of others and the devil would have to be god’s bitch before he showed weakness in front of this idiot. Shaking his head, he rubbed out what he had written earlier and scratched out a new word, sitting on his hind legs waiting for the other’s response after he was finished.

**_Name?_ **

****

The blonde blinked and read the message before replying, grinning as he did so. It was obvious he was getting used to the idea of talking to a squirrel even though if anyone saw him they would consider him crazy. “My name’s Naruto…Naruto Uzumaki. You better remember and believe it!” Sasuke rolled his eyes, obviously sensing that the idiot was proud of his name. ‘Which I don’t understand since it isn’t really that special…’ He thought, resisting the urge to scratch in the word **_Idiot_**. Though he doubted that he would still understand. But despite this thought, Sasuke was very happy inside. He finally knew the other’s name which meant that he was on his way to knowing everything about the blonde. He wasn’t that much in the dark anymore. “Um…what’s your name though?” Naruto asked, leaning slightly over to pet the other. His fur felt so soft and silky that he wanted to touch it all the time. But he refrained as he knew that the other would get annoyed and probably bite him again. Sasuke blinked at him in response, mind a bit fuzzy by the pets. They made him want to drift off into sleep and/or purr like a cat. ‘My name? Oh yeah…my name…’ He thought, blushing in embarrassment; it seemed the pets also made him act like an idiot also. He just hoped that Naruto couldn’t see his blush or else he would be **really** embarrassed. Pulling away reluctantly, he made his way over to his earlier writing and erased it, scratching in his name.

But unfortunately he was only half way through before his unfinished message was washed away and he was soaked from head to toe.

‘No! That’s just great….’ He thought bitterly, glaring at the wet dirt. There was no way he was going to write in mud as it would be a hassle to wash it out of his fur. ‘I just have to try another communication idea…’ Naruto covered himself up as best as he could from the droplets with his jacket before scooping Sasuke up and running to a nearby bus stop. “Are you alright?” He asked, after he had rubbed Sasuke down. _“Yeah, I’m alright….”_ He grumbled, glaring at nothing in particular. He was upset that he couldn’t tell Naruto his name as well as that his idea was foiled. It had been so perfect and gone so well….only to be spoiled by a shower of rain by nature. If it didn’t mean bashing himself, he would have called it pathetic. Naruto took his friend’s answer as clarification that he was okay and settled back, still holding Sasuke protectively and possessively. He was scared that the other would get seriously ill but denied it, knowing that the bastard like squirrel could take care of himself. It didn’t sooth his nerves one bit so he decided to just cut the crap once and for all. “Hey…I’m going to take care of you, okay?” Sasuke blinked before nodding, staring silently at the pouring rain outside with a weird emotion playing in his eyes.

There were no more words or squirrel words said after that; none would have been accepted as it would have broken the peaceful mood that they were in.

“Home sweet home…” Naruto cried out in excitement, grinning cheekily.

After that heavy rain, he was dying to go home and take a shower as it had left him grimy and kind of stinky. After leaving his friend on the couch to dry, he went to do just that. Sasuke was amazed by the size of Naruto’s home and also amazed by his huge curiosity and urge to go explore. He had never felt curious about anything before, he didn’t really felt the need to. ‘But now….oh god now…I just want to run up and down the place and look where no other has looked before…’ He thought, feeling very energetic now. Maybe it was because this house was lived in by Naruto why he felt so, maybe it was something else. But right now, he just wanted to be…like a wild animal. And he went right to that but unfortunately Naruto was not really pleased by his actions.

“Hey…you almost broke my lamp….look, I know you must be panicking at your new surrounding but please don’t worry…its just until the rain stops. Now are you hungry?” Naruto asked, placing the lamp gently back in its former position. ‘Panicking? Who’s panicking? I’m just going by my animal wildness…can’t a squirrel express his wildness without being questioned?’ Sasuke thought, looking up at the other. He was just having fun, he didn’t mean to almost cause damage to the place. ‘Maybe I should calm down….maybe I will after some food…’ Leaping after the idiot, he climbed up to his seemly now usual resting spot on Naruto’s shoulder and looked at him as he worked on the food. Naruto was actually making a peanut butter and jam sandwich but to poor Sasuke it just looked like he was creating mumbo jumbo. ‘What is that purple stuff? And that brown stuff that looks like crap? Do humans eat their own crap? Yuck…’ the squirrel thought, frowning as much as a squirrel could frown. He knew humans were disgusting but not this disgusting.

_“Wait…why are you pushing it to my lips? No way! I don’t want to eat your crap…I’m not like you…”_ Sasuke squeaked, jumping off of Naruto’s shoulder and running away when he offered some.

Naruto looked worriedly at his friend, wondering why he had just run off like that when he offered his food. ‘Does it smell funky or something?’ He thought, sniffing the sandwich. It didn’t smell funky which unfortunately didn’t answer his earlier question. Getting nothing after a few minutes of deep pondering, he shrugged it off and dug right into his meal. He didn’t really much care if the other wasn’t really hungry, only that he had to make himself _not_ hungry. Finishing it off in seconds, he went out to find out what his little friend’s deal was. “Hey….what’s the problem? Why did you run off?” Getting unidentified squeaks in response, he shook his head and walked off. He was way too tired to deal with the USS **(1)** at that moment. That was the wrong thing to do as he got a grip full of claws and a sight full of black fur belonging to a certain squirrel that was _very_ pissed off. The blond man yelped in response, going hysterical and losing his footing, ending with a probable concussion and a big bump as well as darkness after hitting his head on his living room coffee table; Let's just say, the squirrel was feeling **pretty** guilty...

“Ow...my head...what happened?” Naruto whined, when he finally gained consciousness. But staring into worried pitch black squirrel eyes was not something he was counting on. Said squirrel, realizing that the other had not died and he indeed did not kill him and was a murdering squirrel, chattered animatedly, jumping up in joy. It made him want to laugh at how worried the other was for him but it hurt to even chuckle. Sitting up with his friend still on his lap, Naruto smiled warmly at the squirrel, rubbing noses delicately with the other. Sasuke blinked owlishly into space before rubbing noses back, his squirrel cheeks tinted with red. Technically this was a kiss to all animals and he wondered if Naruto knew this and was still doing it willingly; it made the squirrel blush darker. Unfortunately Naruto pulled away, much to Sasuke's disappointment and wrinkled his nose at him. It made Sasuke want to laugh. Realizing this, the blond stuck his tongue out and the squirrel opened his mouth to retort at him when Sasuke got his human kiss debut. The scene looked awkward, the imagination looked awkward, even in words it might have looked awkward and so no one could deny...it looked utterly weird.

Sasuke was in euphoria and shock at the position they were in, subconsciously sucking gently on the other's tongue in his mouth. The muscle tasted surprisingly good and he sucked harder on it, unaware of how he was freaking out his partner in crime. Naruto felt embarrassed, humiliated, horrified, shocked, and even awkward as he continued to stick his tongue in his friend's mouth. He became even more awkward when he felt slight suction on it and wondered if he could pull away and pretend it never happened. But sadly he couldn't...and now he felt utterly pathetic; His first debut had been made. 'My first kiss gets stolen by a bastard squirrel....nice...thank god no one saw me though...’ He thought, unaware of the slight lust gathering in his eyes or the slightly growing bulge between his legs. Who knew the squirrel was such good French? Fortunately that thought made him screech and his head clearer, pulling away from the now surprisingly panting and aroused squirrel. Naruto could have sworn he saw disappointment but he only took a glance as he was running away up to his room to hide from the rest of the world. Black pitch eyes followed his every movement, growing bitter and sadder every inch the blonde idiot took to get away from him. There was no way he was going to know about Naruto now; the other just plain out rejected him and took it the wrong way.

That was the last time he saw his friend for a whole week.

To say Sasuke was inexperienced out in the wet and cold jungle of garbage cans and stinky animals was an understatement. He was freaking scared was the way to phrase it. He had been so angry and miserable about Naruto’s quick departure at what he himself thought was possibly the best time of his life that he had completed forgotten that it was pouring cats and dogs outside. The squirrel shook his head at the ridiculous man made phrase, wondering if the humans could get anymore stupid. It was obviously raining water, not cats and dogs. ‘And speaking of dogs…here comes one now…’ he thought, squeezing more deeply into his hiding place. It had been the same dog as yesterday and the days before that, sniffing the place searching for something. Sasuke had a feeling it was him and was relieved his scent had been hidden by the rain water; he didn’t want to get caught as it looked pretty mean. A familiar voice stilled his movements, his tiny ear lifting up to hear more of the obviously heated conversation.

“A whole week and nothing comes up…god damn it, if I can’t find him in the next two days time then Naruto is on his own….” Sasuke peaked up that, his ears wiggling in his barely concealed excitement. Naruto was looking for him? But why? Didn’t he reject him before? Before the confused squirrel could dwell on it, a new voice answered the other male which sounded a bit muffled as if the person was speaking through cloth itself. “I’m sure we’ll find him Kiba, and please keep your voice down in case the squirrel hears you….remember what Naruto mentioned? He said the squirrel could understand him so it’s best we don’t alert it…” A response was two snorts; one from Kiba and the other from Sasuke who couldn’t help thinking it was a bit too late for that. Despite the urge to go out and let them discover him, he waited in his usual position until they were gone, only coming out three days later and running back the way he came from Naruto’s house. He hadn’t realized it was that long that he had waited to come back and so he wasn’t prepared when he ran into a jean clothed leg that smelled quite familiar...actually _too_ familiar. “Bastard...I finally found you, thank god. I was so worried... why’d you ran off?”

The black colored and soaked squirrel didn’t get a chance to answer before he was lifted up into a sweet smelling towel and strong arms and carried off as if he was nothing but a tender, glass princess. Sasuke was too busy wallowing in bliss to notice and do anything about it, snuggling deeper into the warmth and smell that was undeniably Naruto and purring loud enough to wake dead mice as if he was a cat instead of a squirrel –although said dead mice would go dead again if he really was a cat-. Oblivious to the now warm atmosphere of the house they just entered in, the squirrel mewled as it was turned over and scratched on its belly, knowing fully well that his human companion was smirking and probably storing it for blackmail later but not caring at all. It felt way too good to almost not even breathe...

‘I’m in heaven...’

And then his heaven fell right out of the sky and into the huge, freezing ocean that could outshine hell any day of the week...

Sasuke was spluttering, his head barely keeping afloat above the raging water and so was breathing in a whole sea of water that made it unbelievable that he was still alive and not in the famous Davy Jones locker by now, his ears pressed to his head, half because of the water and half because he was freaking scared out of his squirrel mind! His paws were trying desperately to paddle through the current but it was too strong for him, even if he knew how to doggy paddle, and his body was dipping up and down, up and down and getting water in his nose and mouth and well, although water was good for him, he seriously wanted to exterminate it right about then. When it seemed as if the poor squirrel would go under, he saw a nearby duck and grabbed on, crawling onto it until he was completely out of the water and on its back; he wouldn’t even let his tail touch the water though it was heavy, raising it up as high as it could go. Sasuke would be lying if he was saying he wasn’t freaked out, possibly scarred for life and shivering like a wet cat and also not angry when he saw Naruto laughing at him and did not jump on his crotch, digging his claws in to make him feel the horror he had experienced. 

But then he would be possibly insane to not be doing all that so it was normal behavior...

The blonde didn’t think so, screaming in pain and horror at the fact that the other jumped on his crotch and was digging into him with his sharp claws and whirling around, trying to get him off without causing more pain if he had decided to pull him off but the squirrel wouldn’t budge, almost sounding like a maniac when he laughed if squirrels could laugh in the first place. But of course the squirrel wasn’t an average squirrel and Naruto could testify to that in court if it didn’t mean having to show the bite wounds on mini Naru for evidence. Unfortunately while both were whirling around, one getting revenge at suffering the watery depths called bath water and the other screaming at the pain at his lower parts, they hadn’t notice they were heading straight for the bath and so with a trip, both went down into the cold, icy water. This time, their actions were switched cause the squirrel was screaming in horror at ending up in the same watery depths as before while experiencing pain at how Naruto was slightly squeezing him – more like crushing him to Sasuke- and the blonde was of course, having some revenge. Revenge was best served cold and well; both couldn’t get colder than they were then.

This continued for a few minutes until everyone and everything stopped, both settling in silence and getting a breather –mostly Sasuke- after their actions, glaring at each other as if to blame the other for their predicament before Naruto broke the tension by laughing loudly, patting the other gently, holding him as he got out of the water as to not make the squirrel fall off before grabbing the towel to dry both of them off. It would be a lie to say Sasuke was having trouble how to act or feel in that situation and so he didn’t act or feel, he just went with the flow until Naruto wrapped him into the towel again, snuggling down like before as he was held like a glass princess but keeping an eye open incase the watery depths were in his range again. The blond, resisting to laugh as he realized what exactly was going through his friend’s mind, climbed the stairs to his room, depositing the towel wrapped purring squirrel gently to one side of his bed before flopping onto the other and switching on the TV. With both of them tired from their fight in the bathroom, it wasn’t long before they fell asleep, Sasuke falling first due to the intoxicating smell of Naruto from the towel in his nostrils; he didn’t know why but it seemed to soothe him. After that, it was pure silence with only the nocturnal animals roaming the night for either food, war or a mate, making their nocturnal sounds but not loud enough to wake them up; actually even if a marching band had gone in their room they wouldn’t have woken up. It was only when Sasuke was feeling the ‘call of nature’ that he woke up, crawling through the dark on the bed, trying to get off so he could go outside and complete the ‘call of nature’ when he accidentally stepped on the DVD player remote that was on the lower part of the bed on his side, jumping in fright when the screen switched on, displaying a pair of bodies moving together, both sweaty, both male and both very **hot.**

**WARNING ON! ALERT ON!**

Of course Sasuke didn’t know what he was watching but he had a suspicion and that suspicion grew when Naruto groaned, having glanced over to him at the right time to see his lower parts start to rise in the sheets and hell had to be a chocolate fountain if he wasn’t turn on by the sight of Naruto’ growing’ and so the squirrel started to ‘grow’ too much to his embarrassment; but of course he couldn’t help it. And just like he couldn’t help ‘growing’, he couldn’t help touching as well, pulling off Naruto’s sheet off his lower parts –slowly as to not alert him- and feasting his eyes on the prize; his imagination had no work that night due to the blond having slept naked that night. It was as long and thick as he was, looking like a giant sausage that Sasuke had to curl in disgust as he vaguely remembered a barbeque in the park once, the humans having fried up some sausages and topped them with different toppings before shoving the thing in their mouths; he just could not believe they ate their own cocks. Shaking that thought away, he crawled over to the huge organ, softly laying a brave paw on it before petting it, blushing when Naruto moaned and moved his hips enthusiastically into the touch, encouraged by it to take a brave lick at the tip and even a small bite, getting hotter as the blond moved with even more enthusiasm in his paws; god, that was so hot. It was sad that they ate their cocks, but maybe he could convince Naruto to not eat his. Looking back to the screen, the squirrel’s eyes widened as one of the men’s cock went into the other’s ass, wondering if he could accomplish that with Naruto.

Glancing at the blonde’s peaceful sleeping form, he crawled up onto his thighs, standing up on his hind legs before dropping back down as soon as he could feel the other’s cock touch his small hole, gasping at the sharp pain and pleasure mixed together and keeping still for awhile to get his bearings before moving, ignoring the pain and focusing solely on the pleasure which was causing a large string in his stomach to form and tighten; Sasuke wasn’t going to last much longer and he had just already begun.; hell no was he going to let Naruto eat that beautiful creation. As if encouraged by the compliment, the other flipped over and placed Sasuke on his back, the poor squirrel squeaking at the sudden movement but mostly because of how Naruto shoved deeper into him; god he could feel it up his nose. Without even breaking a beat, the blond moved his hips violently into the squirrel’s tiny hole with his extremely huge cock, grunting noisily as his cock was squeezed deliciously by Sasuke’s heat; it was almost unbelievable that he was still sleeping through all of this. The bed rocked dangerously and the heat in the already hot room reached up to inferno as Sasuke was rammed within the inch of his life by his sleeping friend. Naruto going harder, deeper and faster with each thrust of his hips as the blonde’s climax reared on; Sasuke had come hard about three times already and was heading for his fourth now.; Coincidentally the characters in the film were also close, their thrusts increasing as well.

So hot...so close...

Deeper...

Faster...

Harder...

Naruto’s cock was like a jackhammer now, pounding away fast inside of him with no means of stopping but rather going even faster and more violent; the squirrel wasn’t sure he’d last much longer at this rate which was an understatement at its best, not bothering to keep his pleasured squeaks down any longer which of course didn’t wake the blonde up no matter how loud it became, feeling the tight string in his belly tighten more and more until it finally broke free with Naruto coming a few seconds afterwards. Groaning as he released inside his friend, Naruto rolled over with the squirrel now on his stomach and fell into a deeper sleep, giving a few quick thrusts once in awhile much to Sasuke’s amusement and pleasure; he wasn’t surprised at all, he had a feeling (more like one look and he knew) the idiot had lots of stamina. It was quite a wonder how he managed to sleep that night thanks to ‘Mr. Major Stamina in the bedroom’ there but around three am, the blond finally came one last time and released the poor exhausted squirrel off his cock and back to his bedside, Sasuke falling asleep as soon as his body had hit the mattress; his ass was killing him and he was sticky all over from all his orgasms and his mind was swimming in a pile of goo from the strong aftermath of the whole experience.

So basically, he was content. Then his bladder reminded him again. 'Ugh'

**WARNING OVER! ALERT OVER!**

Unfortunately that didn’t last long as at exactly eight pm, Sasuke was awakened by a horrible screaming; basically Naruto woke up. Blinking away the fogginess and yawning loudly, he glanced over to the screaming blonde wondering what was going on when he saw him pointing to the screen which was still on and was currently showing an interesting position between the two men which Sasuke couldn’t help but stare and roll his eyes at the fact that the blonde was screaming at that; he already saw it already!

_“Oi idiot, stop freaking out already. I already saw the damn thing and personally it doesn’t beat what you did last night by a mile...”_

Sasuke shivered at the recent memory that he very much wanted to experience again but thought it better that they do it in the afternoon since he was pretty sore. Naruto paid him no mind much to the black haired squirrel’s annoyance and quickly turned off the video, now realizing that his friend was in fact awake and glaring at him for possibly ignoring him; Opps. Laughing nervously at the now fuming Sasuke, he quickly gave a nose rub as an apology before bolting off to the bathroom after putting him back on the towel before the angry squirrel decided to grab his nuts again; he needed those after all.

Blushing at the nose rub he got as an apology, Sasuke curled up once more to sleep into his towel but shot up at the sound of rushing water aka **The Evil** ; he had learned quite quickly to fear it. As soon as he realized that **The Evil** was indeed coming from the bathroom and was not in fact coming for him, he decided to settle down back to rest which proved more difficult than said as the sound of **The Evil** was making him sleepless and paranoid more so the squirrel jumped out of bed, and padded down to the bathroom to yell at the idiot to keep it down when he heard sudden moaning. If he was in his right mind, it would remind him of last night’s experience which would in fact make him blush and rush into there for another reason but since he wasn’t thanks to **The Evil** ’s rushing calls, Sasuke thought the blonde was in fact hurt, bleeding and probably on the verge of death thanks to **The Evil** and so rather rushed in there, panicking, unprepared and rather reckless. Unfortunately the floor was slippery and so the poor flustered squirrel went skidding across the bathroom floor, up the toilet and flying through the air doing an awesome 360 spin and...oh yeah, screaming/squeaking his freaking head off like there was no tomorrow, making a perfect splash into the bath tub; if anyone else had saw that they would give him a perfect ten.

**WARNING ON! ALERT ON!**

‘Ouch...gosh I hate...no wait, I loathe **The Evil**....and...and...I’m starting to like it now...’ were Sasuke’s thoughts as he stared dreamily up at a very naked and wet Naruto who he might add was totally hot when he was directly underneath his beautiful sack and cock which he also might add was pumping enthusiastically into him last night which he triple might add he needed to tell Naruto to not eat it; humans were so strange to him. Without another thought, the black haired squirrel pushed up on his elbows and dug his nose right into the area between Naruto’s sack and cock which resulted into a pleasurable surprise; Naruto would disagree. The blonde did not expect to get such an intimate touch when he was bathing, accidentally dropped the soap and kneeled down to pick it up and so gave quite a squeak which turned into a horrified look when he saw his friend aka the culprit who was busy digging his nose again into Naruto’s soft balls. Sure, the blonde was prepared this time but then again...who would be prepared for a squirrel to molest you right in the middle of picking up your dropped soap?

If someone was prepared, it sure wouldn’t be Naruto Uzumaki.

“W-What the heck are you doing?” Grabbing the very aroused squirrel and placing him on the edge of the bathtub, Naruto increased their distance with a few inches when he saw the sultry look he was receiving from said animal; he couldn’t get a girlfriend but suddenly he had the ability to attract squirrels or should he say bastard squirrels instead. Sighing at how totally wrong that sounded either way, the blonde breathed out to calm himself before looking back to the squirrel that was....NOT THERE?!

‘Found him....’ Naruto thought, biting back a moan as his friend bit and sucked at his nipples who being the traitors they were, perked up like blossom trees in spring; god, that sounded so very wrong.

‘How did he move so fast? Why didn’t I feel him? And god damn it, where did he get the skills to do this?’ Staring half lidded at the small tongue that was lapping in his belly button and causing him pleasurable shivers, Naruto tried to clear the lust from his mind which was proven more difficult than said and it didn’t help that his hands and legs felt like rocks so he was totally at the squirrel’s mercy which he knew that if the squirrel knew he would be smirking. Eyes widening as his friend slid down south to his extremely erect cock, he moaned in his throat as he felt hot air blown on it, seriously wondering if all animals were as perverted and skilled as the one he was totally being molested by. Practically melting as the tip of his cock was swallowed in a hot cavern, Naruto tried to find holding for his hands as he felt the urge to slam his friend’s head down so his whole cock could be swallowed more into that delicious heat. His mind was practically blank from pleasure but he was sure it would be either way so he went with the flow, the spring finally broke as the squirrel chewed on the huge vein at the side, erupting with a huge moan of satisfaction; who knew squirrels could give good blowjobs? Mind now buzzing with the aftermath of the near perfect blow he got in his life (he would have preferred if his cock had been swallowed quite deeply instead of at the tip), Naruto could only return the toothy smirk sent his way with a half lidded stare; it was pretty mind blowing to say the least.

‘ _Well...well, nice to see that he enjoyed it as much as me...now onto the main meal...’_

Unfortunately Naruto’s cock was in no condition for the next phase of action so the poor squirrel was at a lost at what to do next, which was pretty sad since he needed his problem solved right away. Sighing and sitting back on his hind legs, he wondered what to do now since the idiot seemed to be down for the count. Fortunately it seemed fate was on his side as he peered even more down south and caught sight of the other’s butthole; Jackpot! Unfortunately Naruto’s euphoria had ended and was now quite sane, quite disturbed and also quite wary and so had easily stepped over the bathtub to get away from the crazy and perverted squirrel which proved to be a fatal mistake as said squirrel wasn’t about to give up that easy and latched onto his leg, climbing expertly upwards up to his thigh and dipping his tongue right into its target. It wasn’t surprising that the blonde yelped in surprise at the penetration and dropped face down onto the floor with his ass hanging up; what a view! Now with a better position than before, Sasuke could now maneuver himself onto to the blonde without any problems whatsoever, his little tongue moving enthusiastically in the hot cavern it was currently seated in; poor Naruto could only squirm in both pleasure and to also get rid of the annoying stars so he could think straight. Dipping further in, his tongue accidentally touched a foreign object inside which surprisingly made Naruto scream with utter pleasure; it didn’t take long for Sasuke to connect the dots and solve the puzzle. Pulling his tongue out of the other’s ass, he lined up his nicely erect cock up to the blonde’s entrance before thrusting up in one go, moaning at how totally hot and nice it was inside; it was almost better than when the blonde did him....close but not quite...

Not even bothering to calm his nerves down, Sasuke continued to thrust away into Naruto who was lying shellshock until his friend accidentally plunged straight into his prostate again; both could have sworn they heard glass breaking somewhere after Naruto’s scream but they couldn’t tell. Navigating instantly where he could make Naruto scream again with pleasure, Sasuke thrusted into that area over and over again, smirking at how breathy the blonde had gotten. Gritting as the pressure continued to rise to higher peaks, the squirrel thrusted harder and faster into his idiot, finally coming deeply into him whilst riding out his climax before pulling out and falling down onto the floor like the other had after accidentally losing his footing, glancing over to see Naruto pumping his now fully erect cock. Nearly drooling at the sight, Sasuke crawled over to it and without missing a beat, thrusted his ass into it, moaning at how full he felt again; it felt like decades since he was fucked by Naruto’s beautiful cock.

Meanwhile the blonde looked down in shock at what his friend was currently doing, moaning when he deliciously squeezed him and sighing when he realized he was too horny to care, grabbing the other’s soft body before pulling back and plowing strongly into the small hole offered to him, thrusting even faster as he felt his climax rev onto him now and gritting his teeth as he felt come pool down his hands, almost coming at the sight of the squirrel’s second climax in a row; he had new respect for him now...

Groaning at the sight of the other climaxing, Naruto slammed his cock in hard, barely realizing that his partner was hitting the pavement with each hard thrust he made-not that his partner was complaining. Sasuke wondered if it was possible to have three orgasms in a row, prostate abused endlessly by the blonde; the blonde’s stamina was ridiculous but it was a godsend. Squeaking in pleasure, the squirrel came even harder than before if possible, squeezing down hard on the hard dick in his ass and riding his high even longer as he felt hot cum blast in his insides. Who would have thought being nice to Naruto would be this rewarding? ‘I need to be nicer to people more...then again, I don’t think anyone’s like this idiot....’

Meanwhile, Naruto, after coming down his high (so many pretty clouds...), was pretty much panicking. Not only did he lose his anal virginity by a squirrel but he also fucked said squirrel and lost his cock(?) virginity on the same day and the sex had been very satisfying on both ends. Naruto glanced down at his friend, nodding to himself as he saw how worn out but happy the squirrel was; yup definitely satisfying on _both_ ends. Realizing he was still buried in the other’s tight ass, the blonde pulled out and groaned as some of his cum leaked out after, cock twitching as if it wanted another round. Naruto wouldn’t have minded of course if it wasn’t, ya know, **A SQUIRREL!!** Lifting the well fucked squirrel gently, Naruto decided to leave him in his room, on his bed, telling the sleepy squirrel that he was going to run some errands and would be back soon after he noticed he was leaving.

**WARNING OFF! ALERT OFF!**

Sasuke nodded and watched with half lidded eyes as his blonde idiot (yes, he was his now!) left, feeling content and sleepy now that his desires had been met most _expertly_ , snuggling in the sheet that smelled like Naruto and taking a big whiff. It smelled like the sex they had last night which made his _interests_ peak again and would have probably gotten him excited if he wasn’t so tired. Awesome sex was apparently tiring...who knew? Closing his eyes, the squirrel drifted off to sleep, dreams filled with strange but comforting images of a blurry figure snuggling with Naruto on an unsurprisingly orange couch. Meanwhile Naruto was trying to figure out how to phrase his problem to Sakura without either scaring her off, freaking her out or causing her to slap or punch him in the face; Sakura had a mean left _and_ right hook for a gentle looking girl and he was way more intimate with them than he needed to be. Telling her that he had banged a squirrel would not be a great conversational starter and she already knew the squirrel could understand people (strange how she believed that) but probably wouldn’t believe him if he said he was ass-fucked by said squirrel. But Sasuke was definitely...not right. The fact that he could handle his cock without problems or even bulging for that matter, and Naruto was definitely not small, was pretty impossible for a normal sized squirrel and for said squirrel to not only tease his prostate but also manage to reach said prostate with his ‘normal sized’ squirrel cock was also not supposed to be possible and they both had happened that very same day. ‘Possibly twice...maybe that wasn’t a wet dream after all...’ Naruto blushed, remembering the tight squeeze around his cock. He had most likely pounded that squirrel for hours and the squirrel had been fine (more than fine) when he woke up.

Sighing as he became even more confused, Naruto quickly drove over to his friend, Sakura’s place, raising an eyebrow when she opened the door wearing Lee’s shirt. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Yes you are but something in my gut tells me that this is important, and I am hoping it is or else I will kick you so hard in the nuts Naruto, so come in and tell me what’s wrong...” Sakura said bluntly, leaving the door open for the other and sitting on the couch, knowing her friend would close it after himself.

Naruto didn’t even blink; if Sakura wasn’t threatening you while being polite sometimes, something was definitely wrong.

“Remember that squirrel I was trying to find after he ran off last week....” Naruto asked, taking a seat next to the pinkette, seeing Lee in the corner of his eye and waving at him as he passed to the kitchen....wearing Sakura’s panties. If Sakura hadn’t given him a look of death, he would have been laughing his ass off and wondering how Lee mixed up both his and Sakura’s underwear. People mixed up shirts but underwear? ‘Hilarious...but not the time...’

“Yeah, what about him? Did you find him? I hope he’s alright...”

“No, he’s fine....more than fine actually...the thing is, I...well...” Naruto rubbed his head nervously, looking away and blushing.

Glare. “What is it Naruto? Stop stalling and tell me already!”

“Promise you won’t hit me...”

Raise fist. “Naruto...”

“I slept with him...” Naruto said quickly, holding up his hands to defend himself.

Sakura’s jaw dropped and then looked suspiciously at Naruto before her jaw dropped again as she saw he was blushing. ‘Oh my god...how is that possible?!’

“When you mean ‘slept with’? Do you mean you...?”

“Yeah...”

“Um...did the squirrel somehow....?”

“Yeah...”

“Did you like it?”

“Yeah....and just so you know, his cock is tiny so I have no idea how he managed to make me cum...”

“....”

“....I don’t think he’s normal...”

Raise eyebrow. “Ya think, Naruto?”

“What do we do?! I mean...he even French kissed me and I slept with him three times and I am confused right now! I mean...are squirrels really like him or is he a special squirrel? Is he a squirrel even AT ALL?!”

Sakura sighed and rubbed her temples, wondering how to deal with this. This was not how she expected her day to go; first Lee acts aggressive for the first time and gives her a right good ‘wake up call’ and when they’re heading towards a second round, Naruto comes in talking about having sex, three times might she add, with a squirrel that may or may not be a squirrel at all. The pinkette was expecting another weird surprise to show up today because weird things always end up in threes. Sighing, she reached over and dialed her old mentor. They were gonna need to serious help with this and something in her gut told her that pervy sage was going to get involved too.

“What are you doing?”

“Calling Tsunade....you might wanna call your pervy sage too but while you’re doing that, go home and bring over your squirrel...”

“Why?”

Raise eyebrow. “We need him here to figure out if the squirrel is a little special than the rest or something more serious....”

“Oh...alright then, I’ll be back in twenty minutes...”

Rushing out the door, Naruto rushed back to his house (after calling his old mentor of course) to get Sasuke, blue eyes softening as he saw the black and white ball of fluff curled up on his comforter. He really didn’t want to wake up the other as he was probably tired after all their ‘activities’ but he needed some answers and he couldn’t get them without the squirrel being there so he gently shook the squirrel awake, rubbing noses with him in greeting and apology for waking him up and lifting him into his arms, holding him like a baby. Smiling at the questioning squeak as he headed out the front door to his car, Naruto told him he was just bring him to his friend’s Sakura because she wanted to meet him. It wasn’t a lie per se but...it wasn’t the whole truth either. Looking at the passing trees and houses from his position on the dashboard as Naruto drove off, Sasuke squeaked as they stopped at possibly the blonde’s friend, Sakura’s house, confused as he wondered why it looked...kinda familiar. That was strange since he had been living in the park, up in the tree as long as he could remember. Which he realized wasn’t that long to be honest....strange...Well, maybe not as he couldn’t possibly remember his times as a baby squirrel _. ‘But then, why can’t I remember my mother or father? Did they abandon me? What about my brother? Did I even have a brother?’_ Squeaking as Naruto took him up gently and carried inside after knocking on the door, Sasuke blinked as he stared at the pinkette. He hadn’t seen that much pink since he saw what the humans called a cotton candy and hers was a much brighter pink than the cloud like candy. ‘She looks familiar though...I think...but I’ve never seen her before so why...?’

_‘Wait, there’s a blonde woman too...not as blonde as Naruto but eh...she’s alright...’_

Squeaking in protest and wiggling when she suddenly grabbed him (or maybe he wasn’t paying attention), Sasuke tried to get out of her hold, freezing when he felt a blue light started shining from her hands and looking up to Naruto for help, squeaking at him to get him out of this mess. Why was he just standing there? Why was this weird person holding him? Why was he brought here? “ _Naruto! Help me you idiot!”_

“Did you find out anything?” Naruto asked, ignoring his squeaks obviously.

_‘Oh, when I get my paws on him, he’ll have to beg me before he goes anywhere near my ass again...’_

“No, not really...I think we need Jiraya...”

_‘...And to make sure he doesn’t sleep with anyone or even thinks of doing it...I’ll bite him so hard on his balls that they WILL turn blue for real...’_

“He’s coming...”Naruto said, eyes widening as he heard a knock on the door, opening it to reveal his pervy old mentor, grinning stupidly as he eyed both the females cleavages not too subtly and getting a bump on the head by both women. ‘When will this old man ever learn?’ Naruto sweatdropped, shaking his head at his mentor getting up to his old antics as soon he stepped through the door, ‘honestly...'.

“So, what’s the problem that you needed me and Tsunade here?”

_“Who the fuck is this guy?!”_

“This squirrel doesn’t seem to be normal...his chi is off” Tsunade explained, lifting up the obviously miffed off and squirming even more furiously squirrel who was glaring death at all of them and who also actually looked a bit sulky too.

_‘Did she just call me weird? Well fuck you too lady!’_

Sigh. “You think Orochimaru is up to his old tricks again?”

“I think so...he seems to be acting a bit too...human to be a squirrel as Sakura told me in...detail,” Tsunade’s eyes snapped over to Naruto who blushed and looked Sakura in disbelief at the fact she told her about _that_ , the pinkette looking everywhere except at the two blondes, finally settling upon a nice spot on the wall. Jiraya seemed to catch on fast and raised an eyebrow at Naruto who realizing that the old man knew, decided to copy Sakura and find a good spot on a wall as well. “He could very well be a human....”

_“Who is Orochimaru? Is he coming over? Is the whole world coming to gawk at me?! And what does she mean human? I am not a human! Humans are disgusting creatures that eat their crap and eat their penises and I don’t want to be anything like you humans, thank you very much! Being a squirrel is fine thanks!”_

“How the hell will we find him? He’s always moving everywhere...”

Raise eyebrow. “You mean you don’t know where your _boyfriend_ is?”

Silence....

“Wait, WHAT?!” Naruto shouted, staring at his blushing mentor in shock.

“THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!!” Sakura’s eyes bulged, jaw dropping the third time that day.

_“WHY ARE YOU GUYS YELLING?! STOP, YOU’RE HURTING MY SENSITIVE EARS!!”_

“It’s true...Orochimaru and this idiot we all know and love have been crushing on each other for years...but this idiot just won’t admit it...” Tsunade smirked, enjoying everyone’s discomfort and shock as they tried to wrap their minds around how the biggest pervert this world’s has ever seen be gay; she reminded Sasuke of a witch.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about! Anyways, we have to turn this squirrel back to human so we need to track down Orochimaru which might take some time...” Jiraya coughed, trying to change the subject.

“Actually...not quite....” Tsunade smirked knowingly, walking out the door with a still squirming and miffed off black and white squirrel in her hands and telling the others to jump in her car, handing the squirrel over to Naruto who tried to soothe the squirrel unsuccessfully, screaming when the squirrel attacked his face furiously and tried to bite after his family jewels. Shaking her head, they drove off to Jiraya’s place, giving clear instructions to Jiraya when they got there before sending him inside.

“You think that will work?” Sakura asked, doubt written clearly on her face; it was obvious that she still didn’t believe the pervy sage was gay.

“Of course...trust me...Orochimaru is crazy over that idiot....”

Twenty minutes later, a blue Suzuki drove up and out stepped out her old friend, all four of them watching amusedly as the pale thin man slicked back his hair, checked his breath and fixed his clothes before jogging up to the door and then leaning boredly against the railing of the stairs as if he hadn’t prepped. The door cracked open and a hand dragged him inside, the door slamming as soon as the man was fully inside. Tsunade shook her head; those two were so predictable, surprisingly Orochimaru even more.

“What are you doing?” she asked, seeing Naruto reach for the door handle.

“I’m going inside...” the blonde said, confused.

“You can’t do that...we have to let them ‘catch up’ first before we go in...”

“So...we just wait...?” Naruto asked, sighing boredly as she said yes, slumping back in his seat and petting Sasuke who had finally quieted down, after many whispered promises of sexual satisfactions later and apologies for ignoring him of course, wondering how long those two would be done. They were both old men but they weren’t _normal_ old man so they could be doing it for hours. The blonde could not wait that long. He was impatient over his bread getting toasted, how the hell was he gonna wait in a car with no form of entertainment around for several hours just so two old geezers could get their rocks off? ‘Life’s not fair...’

Twenty minutes later...

“Are they done yet?”

“No...” Sakura and Tsunade said in unison.

_‘I am so bored...’_

Forty minutes later....

“Are they done yet?”

“No....”

_‘Booooorrrrrrrrrreeeeeedddddd....’_

An hour later...

“Are they done...OUCH!” Naruto yelled, rubbing his head as Sakura punched it hard.

“No, you idiot, so stop asking!”

“Ouch, so mean...”

Growl....

“Ah, I’m sorry, don’t hurt me!”

_‘So bored...and horny...’_ Sasuke yawned, looking up at Naruto, sending him a lusty look so they could get out of there and do something a bit more... _entertaining_...

Naruto blinked as he caught the look and his eyes widened, biting his lip, wondering if he should really do _that_ again with the squirrel. It wasn’t like they didn’t before but still...Jiraya and Orochimaru could be done any minute and if they stumbled onto them doing it in the bushes in broad daylight...the blonde would never live it down. Sakura and most definitely Tsunade would always keep it over his head that he had sex with the squirrel again and in broad daylight too; they would probably call him a perv-so desperate that he would do it in the bushes. Shaking his head, Naruto petted the squirrel as the squirrel slumped in disappointment, tensing when he felt claw marks near his groin. Surely, he wasn’t that desperate right? Looking over to Sakura for help, who was looking boredly out the window, Naruto bit his lip as he felt the other knead his groin again, cock twitching in interest. This was not good...this was definitely not good. “Stop....”

“Did you say something Naruto?” Sakura asked sweetly, her aura and smile promising death.

Naruto sweated. “Nope, just trying to whistle...I’ll stop...”

Nodding, Sakura turned away, missing Naruto trying to get the squirrel off his lap and prevent him from molesting him. The blonde sighed; molested by a squirrel? That was the beginning of a bad joke. Maybe this whole thing was a bad joke...the whole thing wasn’t real or was a prank and he wasn’t going to be molested by a squirrel and he didn’t have sex with a squirrel and wasn’t thinking about having sex with said squirrel right now. ‘Little’ Naruto dismissed that last bit right away, already hardening in excitement, which wasn’t helped by an oh so horny squirrel who noticed right away the big bulge. Naruto never thought a squirrel could look as ravenous as the squirrel in his lap right now. Looking over to Sakura, Naruto shifted over till his back was to her and he was lying on his side on the seat, apologizing to the squirrel who hadn’t liked the sudden change in position and was growling at him. ‘Moody bastard...’

**WARNING ON! ALERT ON!**

Unzipping his pants slowly to not prevent making a lot of noise to alert his car mates, Naruto pulled out his cock, jerking violently when the squirrel decided to give a big lick to his head.

“...Naruto?”

“U-Uh...the squirrel had grabbed me with his claws...sorry...” ‘Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit!’

“Well, keep it down...I’m trying to be bored in peace...”

“Sorry...” ‘Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit!!’

Sakura hmmed and turned to stare out her window, sighing as she waited for two old men to get laid. Seriously? How did today end up being her being cock-blocked (sort of) to waiting on a pervert and a creepy old man that looked like a pedophile? ‘Life’s not fair...’

‘Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit!!!’ Naruto bit down on his knuckles as he was deepthroated...by a squirrel. And yes, you read right. If the blonde hadn’t been convinced that the squirrel wasn’t a normal squirrel before, he was definitely convinced now; his cock was as thick and long as the squirrel himself. There was just no way the squirrel should have been able to handle it. But a small peek confirmed that not only the squirrel handling it, he was _loving_ it, humming and swallowing around it and pulling off every now and then to blow on his slit and give a slow lick before deepthroating it again to start the process all over again; the squirrel was giving a prostitute a run for his/her money.

‘I wonder what Dan wants for dinner tonight. I should make his favourite pecan pie, but what goes great with it?’ Tsunade pondered, tapping out the song ‘Zombie’ by Cranberries on the steering wheel.

‘Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit Oh shit!!’ Naruto bit back a whimper, getting close to climaxing straight into the very willing squirrel’s mouth. ‘God that sounded terrible’

‘Maybe I should try that recipe I saw last night, what was it called again?’

‘Oh shit this feels so good’ the blonde grabbed the squirrel and started moving him violently up and down his dick, trying not to be noticed by the others the last thing on his mind as he used the other like a cocksleeve. Sasuke didn’t mind at all, humming around the beautiful sausage and getting close to climaxing himself even though nothing was touching his penis. He didn’t think it was possible for him to love the sausage anymore but holy Christ, he definitely had to stop the blonde idiot from eating his penis; the squirrel would die without it.

‘Par-‘

‘So close’

‘Parma...’

‘Almost there…’

“That’s right; it was Parmesan Risotto with Roasted Shrimp. I bet that would go great with pecan pie” Tsunade exclaimed out loud, masking Naruto’s poorly muffled yell of pleasure and the soft squish of cum hitting the seat as both blonde and squirrel orgasmed hard, oblivious to what was happening behind her as she glimpsed the movement of a curtain. “That’s the signal; we need to go in before Orochimaru escapes”

**WARNING OFF! ALERT OFF!**

‘Finally!’ Sakura sighed in relief, glancing at Naruto weirdly as he moved sluggishly. She thought he would be the first one to move since he kept being annoying the whole time but shrugged it off. The blonde probably got impatient waiting and fell asleep from boredom. God knows, she almost did. ‘And all for waiting for a booty call between two old emotionally retarded men to end…what is my life?’ Missing her friend in question panicking and wiping a mysterious white liquid from the seats with a handkerchief that he pulled from his pocket, she followed Tsunade inside. It seemed that luck was on Naruto’s side as both women failed to notice that he had just had sex (again! What happened to not being seduced by the crazy squirrel?) in the backseat and the blonde was utterly relieved by that. One, Sakura and Tsunade would laugh and then kill him and second, they would kill him again and then mock him for the rest of his life. Glaring at the very satisfied squirrel, he scooped up the black and white fluff and followed the others, wondering why he was getting a bad feeling.

“Oh my god, my eyes!” Sakura screamed.

“Seriously, you couldn’t have gotten dressed!” Naruto also screamed (manly though), covering his eyes with one hand as he mentally tried to scrub his brain of the horror. They had walked in and discovered the two men were done fooling around but were _way_ too underdressed to have any guests, laying down in the nude and staring starstruck into each other’s eyes. Well, Jiraiya looked sheepish now while the other looked annoyed at the disturbance but they were still in the nude. They didn’t even make an attempt to dress themselves either (which was pretty rude).

_‘…Meh’_

“You can always leave, it’s not like you were invited” Orochimaru sneered coldly, about to shift closer to Jiraiya when he caught sight of Tsunade and froze, going paler than before as he realized that he’d been caught. Coughing, he shifted away and looked around for his clothes, wondering how he’d be able to lie his way out of this one. His old friend was never supposed to find out about them and now it was all out in the open. ‘No, I can salvage this, it doesn’t look as bad’ He opened his mouth to make some excuse but Tsunade didn’t really care to find out what it would be, rolling her eyes and speaking before he could.

“Cut the crap Orochimaru, I know you guys are in love with each other and I couldn’t care less” Tsunade interrupted, putting a hand up to stop the (probably) idiotic excuse. Anyone with half a brain could guess what they were up to; the room literally stank of sex and she was pretty sure there were cum stains on the wall and…was that a stain on the ceiling? “That’s not what I’m here for” And the lava lamp…and the rug…and the slippers…and the stereo…and…

“Y-You’re not? Then what?” Orochimaru blushed; both Naruto and Sakura stared before realizing they were still naked and went back to blindfolding themselves and gagging. Evil snake men could blush, who knew (other than Jiraiya of course)?

“We have a squirrel here who’s acting pretty abnormal and it has your dirty work all over it” Tsunade pointed to the squirrel in Naruto’s arms, the squirrel waving a paw as if to say ‘Hey’ before going back to looking bored. He looked as if he had gotten used to surprise humans (or maybe it was the great orgasm mellowing him out?) and was barely moving in his friend’s arms. “We need you to fix it and we need it done now or otherwise I’m gonna steal your precious Jiraiya away by showing him my boobs”

“Ha! He’s gay and into me if you haven’t noticed so there is no way you’d be able to steal him” Orochimaru smirked, looking to Jiraiya as if to prove his claim and frowning as he saw the pervy sage looking at her large breasts with hunger **(2)**. There’s no way Jiraiya, the pervy sage, would be stolen by that wicked she-demon just by the offer of looking at her large (and disgusting; he was gay remember?) bosom. Right? ‘He loves me right? He never said it but I know he does so there would be nothing to lose…right?' Gulping as he felt uncertainty settle coldly in his chest, he agreed to fix the dumb rodent, eyes widening as he finally had a good look at the squirrel for the first time. ‘Well, well, well…this is certainly interesting…’ Smirking as he stood up (and ignoring the louder gags from the two _children_ acting ridiculous in the corner), he took the squirrel and brought it up to his face, smirking even wider as he realized the squirrel didn’t recognize him. This situation was getting more and more interesting…and possibly entertaining because he recognized that I-just-got-laid look in its black, strangely human eyes.

“Did anyone have sex with this poor squirrel? It looks positively stoned out of its mind”

Awkward silence descended and the pale man almost cackled with glee. Apparently someone (hopefully not Jiraiya) was a bit of a bestiality fanatic.

“Look, can you just fix him already?” Naruto asked, with his eyes averted to the ceiling to prevent from seeing the man’s nakedness, shifting nervously as he could _feel_ those cold, yellow snake-like eyes on him. ‘Does he know it was me? Oh god, please tell me he doesn’t know it was me! Seriously, just fix him already so we can go!’

“Yes, I can ‘fix’ him but I’m still curious as to who would be sick enough to get their rocks off with a squirrel?” Orochimaru asked innocently, really close to cackling as he saw the blonde visibly wince, wondering how much he could really push the knife in. Honestly, this was getting even more and more hilarious by the second. Coughing as he felt a hard glare on his back from the damn woman (almost forgot her), he put the now struggling squirrel (apparently he didn’t like his lover being insulted) down on the ground and stood back, making a few signs with his hands before tapping the squirrel on its head. Instantly, there was a puff of smoke, blinding everyone and making everyone cough for a moment before. When the smoke finally settled, there were four identical gasps of surprise. Sitting where the squirrel was, was a pale man with spiky black hair hunched over with his hands hugging his naked body. The man also looked quite familiar….

“Now that I’ve changed Sasuke back, can you please leave? I have _things_ to discuss with my lover” the snake eyed man hissed coldly, turning those cold yellow eyes onto his lover who gulped; That didn’t sound too good for him.

“WAIT, SASUKE?!” - Sakura

“THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS…” - Naruto

“NO WAY!” - Sakura

“NOOO WAYY!!” – Naruto

“WILL THE BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!?” Sasuke, Jiraiya, Orochimaru and Tsunade all yelled at the same time, glaring heatedly at the two who immediately looked sheepish afterwards. Honestly, it was Sasuke who was the squirrel the whole time. Big whoop! The readers reading this had figured it out ages ago but they weren’t all screaming like a bunch of fangirls who found out their biggest OTP had actually become real. With Orochimaru demanding again that they get out, the now four humans left (after they dressed Sasuke of course), calling the newly humanized brunette’s family (that conversation was a real dinger) before dropping Naruto off at his house. Along with Sasuke. Because of course.

‘I can’t believe I had sex with Sasuke! I can’t believe I had sex with Sasuke when he was a squirrel!! What the ever loving fuck is wrong with me!’

Raking his fingers through his hair in his panic, the blonde failed to see the brunette staring silently at him, too busy wondering what he was supposed to do now. Did the teme remember what had happened when he was a squirrel? Did he want to continue it? Was he gonna call him a freak? If he didn’t remember, was he supposed to just forget about it or tell him? Wait a minute, why would he tell him??? The bastard would just mock him and call him a perverted freak for the rest of his life. No, it was better that if the brunette really didn’t remember then the blonde would just forget about it and pretend it was just a bad dream. It wasn’t like he enjoyed himself much…okay, he did have several orgasms and a lot more sex than he ever had (remember he was a virgin a couple days ago?) so maybe enjoying himself was an understatement. But, it wasn’t like there was a relationship there? Seriously, they hadn’t even gone on a date really and they hadn’t even confessed that they liked each other and…

‘Am I seriously contemplating about having a romantic relationship and going on dates about a squirrel? While, the human version is here’

Realizing that he was probably being rude by panicking and ignoring his friend, he turned around and flashed a big smile, faltering as he wondered what to say to the silent brunette. How did one start a conversation with a long lost best friend who you were sleeping with as a squirrel a couple days ago and was now human and you have no idea if he remembers or not and if you mention anything about it and he doesn’t remember then he would call you a freak and ignore you and…

“Dobe, stop thinking so hard, you’re gonna make your tiny brain explode…”

“Fuck you teme, I don’t have a tiny brain” Naruto growled, getting angrier at the brunette smirking at him in response instead of being offended like he was supposed to. The prick had been living for a squirrel for god knows how long, he fucked him and used him like a slut when he was a squirrel and he had to be turned back into a human like some ‘Princess and the Frog’ type of shit but the prick still managed to look superior and holier than thou than him. Where was the justice in the world? Sighing, the blonde decided to drop it before he punched the prick in his punch worthy but pretty little face.“Look, I don’t want to fight but…how much do you remember?” Feeling worried as the brunette’s smirk slipped off his face and he went back to staring blankly at him again, Naruto wondered if he had overstepped a little. Maybe he should be taking baby steps with the other instead and just wait for the other to speak. Which, unfortunately, didn’t exactly work out though. Growing impatient as the other just stared blankly at him for almost a quarter an hour (can’t believe he waited that long for the other to talk), Naruto grumbled that he was getting something to drink and went off to the kitchen, feeling like he could breathe again. For some reason, the previous room had been tension filled without him noticing. Taking out a cold beer, Naruto sipped it slowly as he wondered what to do next. He had no idea why Sakura had dropped Sasuke off with him and not with his family but maybe he would have do some re-unitement to get the ball rolling to Sasuke fully recovering. It wasn’t like he was making much progress being here if the quarter of the hour he had spent with the bastard was any question. Also it was getting on the blonde’s nerves (baby steps or no) with having to walk as if there was glass on the floor and he was barefoot around the other. The Sasuke Uchiha he knew did tend to blank out sometimes but not to this extent, usually responding with atleast an ‘Hn’ or grunt. ‘Plus if I had been a squirrel for god knows how long, I’d be freaking out right now and ready to talk to someone about it, especially my best bud’ He sighed loudly, rubbing his temple. The whole thing was a mess.

“What am I gonna do with you Sasuke?”

“Don’t know but we could cuddle while you think about it”

Jumping and spinning around (when did he sneak up on him and so close too?), Naruto gaped as he realized the other was half naked, looking away with a blush and pushing the other away from him. Now was not the time to get horny (why was he so horny around Sasuke anyway??) and molest his possibly very mentally delicate friend right now. Moaning as a hand cupped his erection (Little Naruto, you traitor!), Naruto stepped back really fast to put some space between them and breathe slowly. “Sasuke, that’s not funny okay? Look, you’ve been through a traumatic situation…”

“I was turned into a squirrel, not involved in a car crash dobe” Sasuke interrupted, stepping closer to the blonde slowly.

“Still, you are mentally delicate right now and you need to sort through your thoughts and emotions. You must be freaking out at least…” Naruto tried again, stepping back with each step that the other made until he met the wall. Glancing at the door, he wondered if he could make a break for it before both of them did something stupid and irresponsible. Yes, he could smell the irony too.

“I’m freaking out sure…but I have you to comfort me dobe” Sasuke smirked, saying the word ‘comfort’ in the most seductive, chocolate melting, panties AND briefs dropping voice he could muster, smirking harder as the blonde shivered. ‘Just a little more…’

“I can comfort you but at a comfortable distance…like on the other side of the room distance” Naruto gulped, feeling his pants get tighter. Think non-sexy thoughts damn it! Now was not the time!

“But how will you cuddle me when I cry? I need a shoulder to cry on Naruto~” Sasuke moaned to entice the blonde more, even closer than before without the other noticing yet. Just a little more and he’d have the dumb blonde all to himself, ravishing him all over the walls, tables, counters, chairs and maybe even the floor. Biting his lip at the thought, he stepped even closer, wondering if the other had any chocolate sauce to experiment with. He always liked to _play_ with his food when he was in the kitchen.

Breathing hard, Naruto wondered what to do and just blurted out the first thing on his mind:

“I can’t have sex with you Sasuke!! Now is not the time!”

Pausing, the brunette cocked his head to the side and folded his arms, frowning at how the blonde was annoyingly trying to resist him. If he couldn’t resist him in squirrel form, then how the hell was he able to do it when he was human? Was he really into bestiality? Did he like him more as a squirrel and not as a human? ‘Maybe I shouldn’t have changed back after all if that’s the case…’ Feeling self conscious, the brunette went and sat in a chair, arms still folded and waiting for the other to explain. There was no way the other wasn’t (still) attracted to him; that huge erection he felt was proof. The blonde was probably being dumb and overcomplicating things instead of just following his instincts and ravishing him against every surface in the house. Rolling his eyes as the idiot sighed in relief, he tapped his foot impatiently. ‘Get on with it already…;

Sensing the other’s impatience, Naruto carried on, wringing his hands nervously as the other widened at his next choice of words. “Look, I don’t know if you remember your time as a squirrel or not but…it was a mistake okay? I never meant for it to go that far and its best that we don’t continue it either…for both our sakes”

‘Well that took a turn I didn’t expect…’

Feeling his stomach twist horribly, he gulped down the bile rushing up and tried not to let the horror and disappointment show on his face, thanking the gods above that as an Uchiha that ‘emotionless as a statue’ was a default setting that he could fall back on. He had honestly thought that they were gonna continue whatever it was they had after he had turned human and that their time together, although he was a squirrel at the time, had meant something. ‘Guess, it was only me’ “So what? Because I’m not a squirrel, you don’t wanna get your rocks off with me…are you really that sick?” Ignoring the wince at the coldness in his voice, the brunette pushed on, focusing on the anger to rip the other to shreds for thinking he could just throw him away like that and not expect consequences. Uchihas weren’t anyone’s play thing to throw away; they made you their play thing and decided that they were done playing with you. “I guess I shouldn’t have expected much from you, only an idiot would throw away their chance to sleep with a Uchiha and lust after an actual animal…seriously, was sex with a squirrel that good for you? Found a partner that wasn’t bigger than you turn you on? Absolutely _disgusting_ ”

“Fuck you asshole, it’s not my fault you’re such a slut for my dick whether your human or not” Naruto growled out, resisting the urge to cry as he realized his worst fears came through. ‘Goddamnit’

“So what? If a dog offered up their ass to you, you’d fuck it? Screw you Uzumaki, just admit that you’re nothing but a freak” Sasuke sneered coldly, not managing to dodge the first punch but making sure to give back as good as the other gave him. He couldn’t believe he had almost slept with the idiot again and practically embarrassed himself chasing the blonde like some kind of demented whore. ‘Usuratonkachi’

That had been three weeks ago.

To say Naruto was sad was an understatement; more like depressed. The weather outside didn’t help much either with his emotions, too cold and bleak and rainy for his tastes to go out and distract himself. He hadn’t seen hide nor tail of Sasuke for three weeks after beating his ass (not sexually you perverts!), kicking him out and telling him to never return unless he was gonna apologize. Sakura had called the second week asking what was up between them but the blonde refused to say and surprise surprise neither was the brunette according to her. She had called him an idiot for messing it up (what did he do other than be responsible???), called Sasuke an idiot for messing up too (that made him feel a little better) and then told him to go over and apologize (that didn’t make him feel better). Not that Sasuke should come over and apologize but he should go over to his house, ring the doorbell, ask for the giant dickwad of a prick, go on his knees and beg for forgiveness. ‘ Fat chance!’ Naruto snorted, remembering how he told the pinkette that and how she screeched at him; He almost thought he had put on Jurassic Park again. Then he told her exactly why he wouldn’t be apologizing which shut her up and then hang up and ignore him for the rest of the time. Honestly, he had more friends but he was seriously feeling hurt and abandoned because his two best friends couldn’t get a grip. Also, his other friends (namely Sai and Kiba, those bastards) hadn’t stopped mocking him for screwing a squirrel. That had been a fun time. _Not._

Sighing loudly again and wondering if this was how emos felt and if he could possibly rock some black nail polish, the doorbell rang. Which he ignored because again…having a emo moment here and there is no emo in other people. It rang a couple of times (Naruto remembered when he was persistent too once upon a time) before loud thumps sounded and yelling that sounded suspiciously like the brunette he was brooding over. That couldn’t be right, unless he came back for round two of ass whooping.

“Naruto you idiot, I know you can hear me! Open the hell up!”

Naruto stayed silent.

“Naruto, please open the door. I need to talk to you…I’m not here to fight”

Naruto scratched his belly.

“GODDAMNIT NARUTO, OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR OR SO HELP ME, I WILL BREAK IT DOWN MYSELF!!”

Naruto picked up the phone to call the police officers. Was he being petty still ignoring the Uchiha’s threat? Yes. Did he care? Was Edgar Allen Poe a lesbian?

Before he could reach for his cell on the coffee table from his sprawled position on the couch, the door went flying into the next room and fell with a loud clapping sound. Naruto paused and made himself small instead, hoping the other wouldn’t think to search for him in the living room. If the obviously pissed off brunette decided to go upstairs, Naruto could quickly escape out the door and to possible safety like a hotel room or a friend’s house. ‘No that wouldn’t work…I have no money and Sasuke would automatically think to look there…’ Why wasn’t he like those depressed guys who took a trip abroad and decided to immerse themselves in another country’s culture? It would be way more fun and educational than being emo; plus he was pretty sure he wasn’t being emo correctly either. Pretty sure brooding emos didn’t watch My Little Pony and wonder why they didn’t get aroused by cartoon girl horses. Or the problem was that they were girls? Was he gay instead of bisexual? Or maybe it was the fact they were horses which are larger than squirrels? He knew he should have watched Squirrel boy instead but he was so scared of proving Sasuke right that he was attracted to squirrels. ‘Now I’ll die before I ever know…and why is it so quiet?’

Wondering why he didn’t hear the other make his way in and if it was safe enough to check if he could escape, Naruto gulped as he registered a dark and menacing presence above him, praying to whatever god his family used to follow that he wouldn’t die before ever knowing if he was truly sexually into squirrels. What? He had to know…for personal reasons. Turning slowly, he briefly wondered if this was how the victims in Grudge felt as they turned to look at her and knowing that they were staring into the face of Death. “H-hey Sasuke…what’s happening?” Laughing nervously and stopping abruptly when the cold black eyes narrowed and seem to look pretty red and even more dangerous, Naruto decided to sit up for his death. Now way was he gonna take death lying down!

“If I wasn’t coming over here to apologize, I’d kill you right now…but since I am…” Sasuke sighed and mumbled a little.

“I’m sorry what was that?” Naruto grinned, ignoring the death glare now that Sasuke wasn’t gonna limb him up and hang him up to dry.

“I said…I’m sorry, honestly, I’m truly sorry. I never…” Sasuke sighed again. “I never meant to hurt you like that…okay I did, but you hurt me first so I was totally in the right to do so…”

Shaking his head at the ridiculousness, Naruto accepted his apology with a grin and turned on the tv, not scared to put his back to the other like before.

“So…that’s it then?”

“Wha? Oh yeah, I accept. You’re my best bud so…yeah” Naruto scratched his hair nervously, wondering why it felt as if there was an elephant in the room. Elephants? Could be another animal that he was attracted sexually to? Switching the channel to Discover Channel, Naruto got himself comfy, wondering if he would need a tube of lube just in case or a box of tissues. Nah, that was silly. But just maybe…

“…Are you seriously only attracted to my squirrel form?”

“What no, I totally think you look hot…”

“…”

“…”

“Then why can’t we have sex?”

“…”

“…”

“You’re mentally delicate and…”

“You’re not a therapist Naruto, which I’ve been to see one recently by the way, so again, why not?”

“…”

“…”

“I-I…do, you only want sex?”

“…”

“…”

“Do you?”

“…”

“…”

“...No, I want more than sex but if you…”

“I want more than sex too…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah…”

“…”

“…”

Quickly snatching the remote and turning the tv off (why was the dobe watching Discovery Channel?) and ignoring the protest as he flung it across the room to god knows where, Sasuke leaped over to land on his dobe’s lap and mashed his lips with soft ones. This was where he belonged, in Naruto’s arms and kissing him deeply and hello…was that Little Naruto who peeked out to say hello? Grinning, the brunette grinded down hard on the erection forming under him, swallowing the groan as he slipped his tongue into the blonde’s mouth. Moaning as he rubbed his erection against some rock hard abs, Sasuke started pulling off his clothes, wanting some skin to skin contact like never before. When it came to the blonde dobe, it seemed like he was so horny. The whole three weeks had been nothing but brooding (of course), wet dreams, cold showers, therapy, some crying (like he would admit that), being yelled at by Sakura, more wet dreams and being yelled at Sakura some more; It’s amazing how little brooding had been done really. Naruto, following the other, started taking off his clothes too, thrusting upwards hard to rub his erection harder against that tight ass he knew and loved. Actually, wait…Sasuke was human now. Which means, he was probably a virgin since he only had sex with him as a squirrel. Right? Getting distracted as the Uchiha decided to move to his neck to suck a huge hickey, he settled his hands on pale hips, rubbing his thumbs along the V line. From the growl that the other gave him, he was not appreciating the tease but Naruto had been waiting too long (and brooded too much) over just a one bang thank you mam. He was gonna take it nice and _slow._

Grinning wide at the shiver as he took a hold of the brunette’s cock, Naruto started to stroke it slowly, rubbing the slit every now and then, brushing away the hand that tried to get him to speed up. The other’s now human cock wasn’t as long or wide as his one but it was a good size, probably manageable to deepthroat most of it. Testing his theory, Naruto slipped his mouth on the leaking mushroom head, licking the salty precum before trying to swallow the whole organ down his throat. Luckily he had a grip on things as Sasuke never shoved the whole thing down his throat in excitement, humming around the dick flesh he could manage to swallow before gagging. If Naruto wasn’t hard before, the loud moan that ripped out of Sasuke was definitely dick raising. Bracing himself, he pushed through his limit and engulfed the rest of the erection slowly, swallowing hard as he breathed in the sweet scent in the dark curly pubic hairs. Sasuke screamed and orgasmed hard, squirting his seed down the blonde’s surprised throat. Swallowing again and humming again at the taste, Naruto pulled off slowly off the softening cock, licking his lips as he wondered if he liked the taste of cum or not. It was salty that was for sure but…he wasn’t sure if it was gonna be one of his favorite drinks. Smirking at the blissed out look on the Uchiha’s face, he lowered the other onto the rest of the couch and lifted up his legs. He was nowhere near done with the brunette. Looking at the tiny twitching hole, the blonde sucked a few of his fingers (since the other was too tired to do it), circling one finger around the rim before slowly pushing it inside. Sasuke groaned at the intrusion but stayed still, whimpering as the blonde managed to brush his prostate on the first try. Panting as the blonde continued stretching him, thrusting down on the fingers when they brushed his prostate and whimpering when the blonde massaged the tiny nub, the brunette sighed in relief and disappointment when the other finally removed his fingers. He held his legs open and close to his body to expose his hole, his newly awakened erection standing proud on his stomach between his thighs, smirking as he saw the blonde’s eyes darken at the submissive sight. God, the Uchiha was such a slut for his cock.

Positioning his hard tip at the prepared hole, Naruto nudged at the opening gently before sinking into tight, spine melting heat. He had to grit his teeth to go slow and not hurt Sasuke, grunting as he bottomed out and waiting for the other to tell him to move. Sasuke was in pain and pleasure, idly wondering why it was easier to take Naruto’s fat cock when he was a tiny squirrel with a tiny butthole. Forcing himself to relax with the knowledge that it was gonna get better, Sasuke nodded for the blonde to go. ‘Holy shit!’ Screaming as the blonde pulled back to the tip and slammed in hard straight into his prostate (why is his aim go good?), Sasuke continued screaming as Naruto took his scream as encouragement and just started fucking him into the couch. It wasn’t a bed so it wasn’t perfect but both of them didn’t really care, Naruto just trying not to cum too early as he buried himself in the tight hot hole of Sasuke Uchiha over and over again. He hadn’t really meant to start off so rough; really, he had been planning on going slow but the tight heat. It was too much for the blonde and he had to make an dick imprint in Uchiha, had to make sure he knew that his hole was Naruto Uzumaki’s property and nobody elses. Sakura had totally been right that they were total idiots; they could have been doing this ages ago. All over the living room, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom and anywhere else around the property. Naruto growled as he thrusted harder, cock throbbing at how he was gonna wreck the Uchiha that week and the next week and the next. God, he wanted to cum…and right in that ass too. Still screaming himself hoarse as his ass was pounded to kingdom come, Sasuke shivered as he felt the throb in his ass. He knew Naruto was gonna cum in him and as much he hated to admit it, god he wanted it. He wanted the blonde to fill him up so bad that he’d be shitting cum for the next few days. Toes curling at the thought, he rushed towards orgasm; thrusting back onto the cock filling him harder than before (he had been doing it unconsciously). ‘So close, just a bit more’

“N-Naruto…”

“S-Sasuke…cum…” the blonde growled, reaching for the brunette’s erection and stroking it at the same pace as his thrusts.

That did it and Sasuke got another spectacular orgasm, streams of white covering his stomach and even reaching as far as his chin. Grimacing at the tight squeeze on his cock during the other’s orgasm, Naruto thrusted a few times hard and licked the cum off the brunette’s chin before burying himself deep and staying there, groaning as he filled the Uchiha’s insides which his cum. Giving a few more weak thrusts to empty himself, Naruto fell on the equally exhausted Uchiha, groaning as the other complained about him being too heavy and trying to throw him off. “Come on Sasuke, just give me five more minutes and then we can move to the kitchen next”

Pause.

“Okay”

Naruto sighed in relief.

“But only five, usuratonkachi…”

Naruto laughed silently, happier than ever.

“Yeah, yeah…teme”

.

.

.

.

.

“Wait…does that mean I like squirrels or just Squirrel!Sasuke?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“No, not really”

Snort. “It’s…the five minutes are up!” Shove.

“Ow, teme!”

“Hn”

_End_

**Note:**

**1** \- USS means Unidentified Squirrel Squeaks

**2** \- Jiraiya’s gay for Orochimaru but…no one except Dan and Tsunade has ever seen Tsunade’s boobs.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading all the way and reaching the end of the story. I was about to put a bonus scene but that would make it seem like I'm gonna add to it and I won't. If you cringed at the sex scenes, I am so sorry. If not, thank you so much. Regardless, I hope you enjoyed the story anyways. 
> 
> Again, thank you so much for reading one of my masterpieces. This story took YEARS (and I am not exaggerating) to finish. I think I started this story back in 2014 or 2015 and I’m just finishing it. If you can get over the fact I can’t write porn properly then I hope you laughed. If you didn’t, please note I haven’t written anything in years. I am like a toddler at writing but that is a bad thing to say cause toddlers are not to go anywhere near stuff like this. 
> 
> I’m making it worse aren’t I? Anyways, hope you enjoyed. Maybe I’ll finish and put up the other two masterpieces (I consider them to be masterpieces cause I love them so much and they both took me ages to write), maybe just the pieces I have of them. I don’t know.


End file.
